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The Gift of Fear: Survival Signals That Protect Us from ViolenceThe Gift of Fear: Survival Signals That Protect Us from Violence by Gavin de Becker

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Read This Book—It Can both Save and Enrich Your Life

Simply put, this is a book everyone should read. It reminds all of us that we have “gut instincts” or “intuition” that is not our imagination—it is thousands of years of the subconscious reading signals we can barely verbalize. We know how to read signs and indicators that can help us avoid trouble, and may even save our lives.

But modern culture tells us we must be polite, we must not argue, we must let people push into our personal space. Wrong. Read this, give it to your loved ones. Don’t let a teen, girl or boy, leave home without reading this book. Discuss it with them. We waste time being afraid of things we can do nothing about, things that have little chance of hurting us, and ignore our Spiderman Sense when it screams a warning.

Chances are, you have sociopaths and psychopaths who have crossed your life. Help your children learn how to avoid the dangerous ones. Highly recommended.

View all my reviews

Date: 2015-10-08 07:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I haven't read this book, but I've often seen it recommended. The one caveat I've often seen along with the recommendations is the warning that the chapter on domestic abuse is rather victim-blamey.

Do you have any thoughts on that?

Date: 2015-10-08 10:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile]
I chewed through it fairly quickly. I don't remember feeling that it was overly blame-y in any fashion. He pointed out that if you are alive to read his words, you have kept yourself alive, and every new scrap of information will help you do an even better job of this.

I should say that I had a relationship with a psychopath, and it took me years to get out of it. YMMV for sensitivity to the author's phrasing. I'd recommend checking it out of the library and reading every other chapter first, perhaps. Don't deprive yourself of good info because the man wasn't PC enough for some people at one point.

He was a victim of horrible domestic unrest, BTW. The chapter on assault might be triggery for survivors, so go in prepared.

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