SNAKE! Snake Snake Snake Snake Snake!!!

[alfreda89]

I went out into the garage to see if we had any scouring putty or touch-up paint, because I'd already nicked the bumper of the new car. (Less gnashing of teeth when you've already had a ding...) The place to look in this overcrowded place was near the front, so I hit the button and started down the path between boxes.

We're talking less than two strides from crossing under the rising door, and suddenly a small, middling green snake with yellow SOS dots and bars stripes dropped from the door to the ground.

It panicked and dove under the lawnmower.

I ran inside and did bevhale's snake dance. I did not, however, threaten to quit.

W brought me a BIG flashlight, and I bravely peered under the mower. No snake to be seem. W kicked the wheel. Nada. It could be anywhere in the garage, and I mean anywhere.

I closed the garage door again, after failing to find what I came out hoping to find, and as a parting shot, yelled to the snake: "I have three cats in this house, and I'm not afraid to use them! You crawl under the door, you are SO dead! Go chase something outside, it's your job!"

(Notice, I am not dwelling on the fact that this snake, probably the thickness of a medium-sized pen and maybe a foot long, just missed landing on my shoulder as he fell off the rising door....)

I am NOT afraid of snakes. But I have two friends who are, and I want this house shared by three cats and two humans, period. If I want a snake, I'll look for a legally-raised San Francisco garter snake.

I have standards.

Perhaps sparkylibrarian and I will have a snake hunt....

Comments

[starcat-jewel.livejournal.com]

"Snaake! Snaake! It's a snaake!"

Alternatively:

"GET THAT M*F*N SNAKE OUT OF MY M*F*N GARAGE!"

[alfreda89.livejournal.com]

That's the subtext of Bev's remarks. It's amazing how many things she can convey simply by repeating the word SNAKE! (So I had to tease her -- ask her about the snake in the office story sometime.)

My friend Inky would have passed out cold. Me, as long as they mind their own business, they're cool. But not in the garage, because there's a crack under the house side door where we stuff a towel.

If that snake sneaks in, I guarantee he will be a snakeburger...

[hutson.livejournal.com]

Hysterical. Glad it wasn't too tramatizing. :)

[alfreda89.livejournal.com]

I figured we could all use a laugh these days...;^)

[cabin77.livejournal.com]

I'm not really afraid of snakes, either. But I AM afraid of having a snake drop on my shoulder unannounced! Ewww! Ewwww!

Last fall Hubby noticed the cats staring intently out one of the windows on the landing of the stairs. Upon further examination, there was a small snake on the windowledge outside the window. It looked for all the world like some sort of baby constrictor! It was small, but thick and had a constrictor looking head. The house next to ours is populated with about 4 or 5 bachelors in their twenties, so it's not out of the realm of possibilities that it was a pet that escaped. The bad part is that after a few minutes we couldn't see it any more. Hubby is now convinced that it's living in our walls. It has also grown from a small, baby snake into a twelve foot long python. :-)

Yes, the almost drop was the bad point --

[alfreda89.livejournal.com]

-- and being grateful that the friend who would pass out wasn't there to go face down in the mulch.

Sounds like you can't trust your sweetie to remove snakes back to the garden...;^) As always, Mom gets the hard job. I should post a couple of my Mom stories sometime. She panicked two weeks out with a new baby (hormones, my guess) but by the third kid, she could haul a dead bird out of a dog's mouth in nothing flat!

[bevhale.livejournal.com]

I told you - no snakes, not now- not ever. Nope. Nothing with more legs than 4 or less than 2. I'd have levitated and been standing on top of your shoulders. Hate snakes. Ick.

[alfreda89.livejournal.com]

I'd have levitated and been standing on top of your shoulders.

You are obviously the snake dance friend -- the passing out friend wasn't there, either.

Trust me -- I have three mighty hunters. If the snake makes the mistake of trying to move in (I doubt this, because he'll have to get up the concrete lip) he will be a snakeburger within a few hours.

[tia-tarina.livejournal.com]

You know that I catch snakes for fun and profit, don't you?

I'm especially good at catching the venomous ones. My record is twelve diamondback rattlesnakes in just under two hours. *That* was a great night herpin'.

David wouldn't let me keep the coral snake I caught. :( I had a padlocked cage and everything.

[alfreda89.livejournal.com]

You know that I catch snakes for fun and profit, don't you?

I do -- but I thought of Sparky first because she HAS a snake right now. This one is hardly worth your time -- he's cute and looked like a letter S gone haywire. Not like the dead rattler in the cooler, or any other of your bragging rights critters.

David wouldn't let me keep the coral snake I caught. :( I had a padlocked cage and everything.

Well, as a speculative fiction person, I can see where all the speculative fiction sagas were firing in his head bigtime -- like you'd have a Dragon's Lair event or something, and some idiot teen with a drunk on and good lockpicking skills would have ended up in the hospital, it's liability city...

I'm afraid I see his point.

Clearly, what you needed was a separate building with a Medeco six tumbler deadbolt on it as well! Then it would have been fine!