alfreda89: 3 foot concrete Medieval style gargoyle with author's hand resting on its head. (Boobies!)
alfreda89 ([personal profile] alfreda89) wrote2013-06-04 09:48 am

So--Women want sex, and Men want to control it. Five hundred years of history, new version.

I need to do a bit more research on this new nonfiction book, What Do Women Want? by Daniel Bergner. But looking at this Slate article, I suspect that the exploding curiosity about erotica and all things female comes from the fact that ebooks makes it much easier for women to explore what they want in all things sexual.

Men don't want them doing that. They want this mythical woman who is always ready when they are, but a woman with her own needs and ideas, a woman who might pack up and walk out after a one night stand--or who might say no, thanks, because she isn't interested without an emotional aspect?--no, that's scary.

Hence one of the attractions for men of porn. No threat pinup girls.

The patriarchal form still rules, unless we keep fighting it.

[identity profile] starcat-jewel.livejournal.com 2013-06-04 06:16 pm (UTC)(link)
"Imaginary lovers never let you down;
When all the others turn you away, they're around..."

[identity profile] deborahjross.livejournal.com 2013-06-05 12:03 am (UTC)(link)
"What do women want?" Isn't that what Freud asked?

[identity profile] tylik.livejournal.com 2013-06-05 11:46 am (UTC)(link)
Bah. I am failing to count the men with who, I had "no strings sex" and who, in the morning, not only wanted but seemed to presume they were entitled to a relationship.

[identity profile] alfreda89.livejournal.com 2014-08-08 06:48 pm (UTC)(link)
This got lost in the queue?

A girlfriend told me the same thing. She's lost track of the times she's said, "No, we just had great sex. That doesn't mean we are destined to be soul mates."

Men have their own private "this is what I am looking for" lists, too. I can understand their wanting sexual compatibility high on the list, but I have a few things higher.